Free Climbing With No Hooks

by natestapes

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The Ascent 02:14
My inability - To speak is slowly killing me, It’s hurting those around me but they always keep forgiving me. I’m in a different world It seems I’m from a different breed Literally, Pain is not defeated through my victories. I’m digging through the rubble that troubles me in my darkest hours, I harness power that crushes me I’m hardly a coward But the voice inside my mind just keeps projecting outwards Testing me, Always thinking less of me I’m sinking downwards. I’m smoking weed and I blow it into a potent breeze I slowly freeze as I put my faith in my only dream I slowly breath ‘cause the path I’m making’s a lonely stream And I’m surrounded but know exactly what lonely means. I’m a lonesome fellow, hoping that the clod will settle It will never kill me still I’m falling like a roses petal. My flow’ immaculate the slowest growth is accurate, How I find the words to free my soul is so miraculous. My mind is such a sacred place So I should save some space I’m filling it with worries and they’re spilling on my naked face. I’m always giving more than I can take When I am giving help, Putting all my dreams inside a coin Beside the wishing well Missed it by an inch, I guess that didn’t help Listen well, Those who search for comfort in their withered shells This is hell. But only if your mind is in a dip of health Dip of form, I am merely human in a different form - Giving warmth To anyone who listens to my lyric storms, You should never focus on the path in life you didn’t walk. Yo, I said, You should never focus on the path in life you didn’t walk.
The tides are changing. Everything I caged in is escaping, And I can only blame it all on Nathan he’s a pagan But really I love him more than I hate him. He’s moving through the darkest places Because they’re spacious And he’s human but his heart is vacant. His heart got scared but he’s been choosing very path he’s taken. He’s like a Spartan in the booth he fight s with heart and patience. Yo, yo, The road he follows isn’t borrowed Dragging all his baggage with his pockets full of sorrow Focus son the past He shouldn’t focus on tomorrow Now he’s focused on the task of chewing up before he swallows. Yeah it’s back to basics, His problem punched him in the face but now he’s back to face it And then it punched him in the brain so no he’s back to training Back to where he started he departed with a lack of patience. He’s working hard but not as hard as he can work It’s like his words provide a mask And they’re just masking up the hurt that’s worsened. It’s such a burden when you try to be the perfect person And he’s been learning that perfection is the devils worship. He fights his demons so there never is a peaceful evening He writes and speaks about the life that he has dreamed of leading, He is the person that he should but still does not believe in Moving all these mountains but his shoulders are a bit deceiving. His only limits are the ones that he imposes, He’s the furthest from the finish line but focused on the closest He could split apart the oceans Like his middle name was Moses, On the mic he’s so ferocious but he doesn’t even notice… Because he feels like he’s a fraud, Feeling like he didn’t even earn what he affords But he’s slowly learning that he’s fighting for a cause And it’s been causing all this fighting that’s inside him like a war. He’s turning twenty three And he’s too focused on the things that he could never be, if he could muster up and focus all that energy Then he would be unstoppable and live throughout the centuries. But that’s a hefty task, If you’re not sure about the answer then it’s best to ask Nate will never ask he’s ridding solo just to test the bar, The bar gets raised, he still amazed that he could get this far. He sheds some light inside his heart when things are getting dark When things are getting hard he never seems to let it pass Determined to succeed to reach the stars he needs to stretch his arms, He feeds his dreams because too many people let them starve. He’s running rings around himself inside his mind It’s hard to find the perfect balance when you’re life is in declined You’re not defined by who you are But by the usage of your time I find it useless just to use it in pursuit of what’s despised. His eyes are withered he’s a lizard and he’s cold blooded. And he’s a wizard causing blizzards now his soul’s flooded, It’s so rugged, so precious that he won’t touch it, He’s no puppet, no pressure when his soul’s crushing. He’s getting high to deal with problems that he faces It’s the basis of himself that’s in one thousand different places He’s been wasting all his time but all his time has not been wasted, Though he always gets distracted by the ladies pretty faces. Moving through the darkest places, Because they’re spacious And he’s human but his heart is vacant. His heart got scared but he’s been choosing every path he’s taken. He’s like Spartan in the booth he fights with heart and patience Yo, huh.
If you have troubles on your mind then please just take a minute, To understand that all your problems are just here to visit. I know it’s difficult to see it on a single digit Or when you’re feeling so depressed that you’re not even living ‘Cause I’ve been there before, I acted like it didn’t faze me But all my problems multiplied and that just drove me crazy And I’ve been going through the pains ‘cause I’ve been growing lately, And I’ve been going through these changes I’m evolving safely. Because to change we need the pain to hold out who we are I make the most of every moment ‘cause we’re moving fast We’re moving faster than we should and then we lose our paths, And it’s my turn to raise the bar but I just choose to pass. I should really heal the wounds I’ve been accumulating, I’m still escaping when I smoke and damn I truly hate it… I guess this life is what we choose to make it, I said I guess this life is what we choose to make it. I roll around in my bed as I feel a wave of sadness And when I’m in that state I can’t control the madness. I close my eyes and drift away I’m slipping through the mattress I made a plan but never followed through with all the tactics. and I’m still swimming in pool of mediocracy, I work to be a man but still I’m not the one I want to be. I’m drowning in my thoughts when I just want to breath, Why am I only finding peace when I have gone to sleep? Really this life is not the beginning This life is far from the end and I’m trying not to diminish. Really I’m fighting pst all my limits I fight the past with a pen and I’m trying not to relive it But it’s difficult. I know that really I’m so minuscule - If the universe was like the oceans I’m a swimming pool, And so my problems are just really not that big at all, Now I see that all my problems aren’t that big at all. ‘Cause I’m so miniscule.
The sky’s the limit when you’re limiting yourself What, you really thought you’d finished? You should listen it could help. And I know I’ve been living in a shell Up above the clouds, I know I’ve been hindering myself But I’m loving how, Everything Is different here in hell When I’m coming down, Everything is different and it’s felt. Lately I’ve been focused on things that were never meant for me I take a thousand steps but I’m really only a centipede, I am an entity, that’s floating through the centuries So even if I die I know that this I not the end for me. But either way I’m not afraid of death or taking rest I work my arse off then I always seem to make a mess I know this weight can still be lifted f I take a breath, Really it’s amazing what’s achieved through taking baby steps yo… (Let me catch my breath). I’m making moves and breaking boundaries Who would chose to doubt me? With all this knowledge I’ve acquired I’ve been moving mountains. And I don’t chose to move around them I’m a looming falcon, I take control of my trajectory I’m truly grounded. I live free there’s nothing I can’t reach I got, Big dreams in one and a half leaps I was, Sixteen with nothing but hard knees Now I, Spliff trees so nothing can harm me. My spirits tainted ‘cause I push it past the limits Pushing hard I’m grinding Pushing hard until my time is finished Pushing out my struggles Lighting up the fire they extinguished Building out the rubble, I should use the time that I’ve been given. Life is not about remembering everything that you lose Because you focus on the negatives every time that you do, You’ve been coping with the sedatives knowing you’ll only lose But if you really look there’s medicine deeper inside of you It’s keeping us kind of lost, it’s the key to us finding truth… We’re not los, we’re just trying to find proof And we, get squashed while trying to find room. I welcome darkness and I seldom welcome hardships If you think that you’re the hardest well my craft has now been mastered. I’m not the smartest, not the strongest, not the fastest But my self belief is deeper than your best performing artists. Now I’m a product of the struggle and the pain, The struggle didn’t drown me No, I used the struggle to escape Everything around me’s nothing but a product of my brain So if I never doubt, I will smash the levels that I face. I’ve been running from, Everything that’s tested out my faith And I’m running still, feeling like I’m running out of space. I’m running into trouble and thinking about what’s yet to be I should never fear ‘cause my angels are always next to me And when I’m drowning in problems I know that life is testing me And when I’m trying to solve them, I evolve intellectually. I’m just striving to live in line with my destiny Every time I lose it, it seems like I lose sight, It seems like I got weaker with every reclused fight When I, Lose focus it seems that I lose light.
This is my story, I’m the one and only perpetrator. Shallow on the surface I’m not perfect like a calculator. Callow, I’m a wordsmith and I’m worshipping my dreams I’ve been working on my burdens they’ve eternally decreased. I’ve been seeing signs and messages Taking the right direction I feel it inside my penmanship, dealing with all this pressure And feeling like there’s no end to it. Things can only get better I’m sweet, I’m very fortunate Didn’t live in an orphanage Putting into proportion the things that I’ve been afforded. The world’s distorted and swarming with evil forces I’m cautious of people’s causes ‘Cause “everybody’s important” If everybody’s important, Is anybody important? You see, Life is simple we chose to make it so complicated, Stuck inside my mind I’ve been busy having some conversations Stranded on my path this is not the life that I contemplated, But we all have problems I can’t avoid all these confrontations. Investing minutes No stress when I test my limits ‘Cause stress can infect my spirit Like when I forget my lyrics yo. I’m truly lonely ‘Cause no-one will ever know me I’m phone don’t ever hold me I’m pushing away my homies- And anybody that loves me. That’s kind of ugly I’m wondering how they hug me and love me When I have nothing to give. I’m indecisive But never when in a crisis Advice is one of my vices ‘Cause I was never the wisest. I’m trying to stretch my limit While keeping my self alignment, I blindly neglect my spirit To be is my next assignment I’m leaving. I’m meeting demons That scheme to defeat my being It’s dreaming that keeps me breathing I’m deep in a state of sleeping. Now I’m moving fast and moving past the basics I’m a shooting star that’s looming large And losing half my patience. Now I’m jumping out a moving car To chose the oath I’m taking But the moment that I lose my heart I’m zooming past the pain. Now I’m structuring life, Like I’ve been conjuring light, And it’s just something inside me that’s been obstructing my sight. All the things I’ve been hiding from were just stuck in my mind, So no I search for myself when really there’s nothing to find. It’s so illogical Really nothing’s impossible Working until I’m unstoppable Worthy of every chronicle. My life is summarised in every single moment I’m so grateful for body and it’s magical components i’m so grateful for my spirit and the way that I’ve composed it It’s composure when exposed that shows our bigger broader shoulders, I’m a boulder I’m a soldier and my heart is made of culture. Controlling elements, Losing hold of my decadence, Choosing hope over everything You will know if you’re relevant You should go and remember it Truly show your development. And live free. Everybody really just wants to live free.
Ive overdosed on sadness Now I’m facing all the repercussions, Grief Is something that I need And I just need to trust it, I’ve been sleeping with my demons For Some cheap assumptions, I’ve been fighting to survive bellow the deepest dungeons Here after the briefest slumber. I roll the dice I keep on landing on uneven number… Never surrender to a greedy hunger The lightening strikes before you hear the thunder, Our minds are clogged and I unlock them with abbey plunger. This is how I do it and I know that there are other ways I never pray but see, my angels are a breath away And I’m awake but still I’m dreaming of a better place I need a bit of space, My mind is overloaded. It seems like everything is strange the more I get to know it No I’m not the best of poets And I do not stress to show it Now I’m on the path that I’ve requested and it’s stress I know it. This life is beautifully challenging, It will never put you to the test if you can’t manage it So put your back in it You’re frozen like a mannequin. Focus on the baby steps for problems that you’re handling And all your problems soon will be resolved through understanding them. That’s my methodology And juxtaposedly my odyssey, Writing like I studied anthropology, I study life and it’s so hard to find some honesty ‘Cause everywhere I look I see the lies are right on top of me. That’s why I write to find some honesty ‘Cause honestly - I see the world as a monopoly, Where most the people never strive for what they want to be, And Most the people only look for what they want to see… And we’re enslaved so is this slavery? The media tries to hide it but I put it out there blatantly. And it’s the truth that’s really saving me Now that’s ironic cause the truth is also breaking me. That’s the hardest part, And you can’t make it in this life with only half a heart, That’s kind of obvious so maybe that’s my daftest bar Or maybe it’s the smartest I don’t know - I guess it’s hard to grasp. What I see is not just half a glass, It’s a blessing that the glass is even ours to grasp I’ve been grasping straws and it’s the grass that really calms my arse, I enjoy the tears because I know I’ll be the last to laugh. I suffer from instability I nearly quit school and I nearly suffered the military. I found music and really found an affinity Until infinity, I really mean that literally, Now I see that life is not a burden is was gifted me. And I don’t live to be, I live to seize the moment that’s My self fulfilling victory.
The truth’s beyond what you’re perceiving. Progress can’t be made if we are focused on our demons, You can judge me by my face - I will not judge you for your reasons I am advocating change We need to change who we believe in be the, Bright spark amongst the takers an the heathens If your plate is full of bread then you should break it make it even. ‘Cause some people die of hunger while the rich are over eating, It’s the same damn people that have robbed us of our freedoms! If you think that you are free then you’re a sleep and you’ve been dreaming If you see the world’s asleep it’s not a dream we must defeat it. All you need to do is plant a seed, Life is not about being the largest of the trees. Focus on your growth instead of what you can’t achieve, Focus on your goals and on the path to reach your dreams ‘cause: That is what it takes to be the greatest, The greatest you can be You need a little bit of patience. When you’re destined for the stars this life will tend to keep you waiting Man we’re blessed to be apart of everything that’s slowly changing. The system is corrupt we need to make our own arrangements, Spread love to all your loved ones and the haters Because when we share our anger well our hatred is contagious If we chose to spread some love then all our pain would start erasing. Life is tender and today could be my last, No I can’t predict the future and I can’t relive the past. I know it’s hard to see the truth when every path could lead to darkness But the path to seek the truth is only partially the hardest. How can we say that home is where the heart is? When we’re tearing up our home we make a really easy target
For the people that divide us Through the system they provide us And they’re spreading a disease that’s called “controlthepeople-itus”. Positivity can really change a person And the pecimist perceptions that we carry as a burden I know, That people like to focus on their earnings but, When we die you’ll see that money’s really worthless. And I know if I’m alive today it’s for a deeper purpose I’m just nervous for the people that will judge me by my surface. I sit and wonder, Do they really think they’re perfect?
Are we really judging people by the ones they chose to worship? Really people need some focus on their side Because it’s when we chose to focus that we hone the flow of life and I know, That I’ve been flowing with the tides, riding with the waves, Now that I appreciate the light I can turn the page. But I’m never burning bridges Years are passing by me I’ve been burning through the digits. But lately I’ve been slowing down the minutes Slowing down the hours Slowing down until I’m out of wishes That’s my magic power, And I wished that time was non-existent i’ve been thinking outwards, Thinking about the lies of our existence.
Really I’ve been walking down this road For a long, long time but I haven’t lost hope. Really if I never get far Then I guess the next life is another step closer. Every day is a blank new slate I hate when I start on a brand new page, Dragged from your bed by the plans you made Or the strength you have from the past you’ve faced. You’ve got to get your life in check got to pay those bills But you’re far too blazed. Never say that your life’s not blessed when you don’t feel real and you half lose faith. The darkness comes if you seek it Look for the light when your life’s at its peakest I feel alive when I write and I deep it I get so depressed but it’s time to defeat it… Time to repress al the lies and the secrets Try to express what you find at your weakest And have no regrets ‘cause this life is a sequence. And you’ll get yours Never doubt yourself never doubt your cause, I drowned in stress I was down six floors Then I climbed those stairs and I found six more Like is this a sick joke, and then I just paused… And then I just thought Well, this is just life and life’s too short In the span of a life Really what is six floors? Really what is this for? If we climb to the top do we really see more? Or is that just part of the greatest illusion? We think that we’re faced with the fate that we’re choosing.. Really this shit’s so confusing Really the life that we live’s an illusion Burdened with failure I thought I was losing, That’s one of my many excuses Time is a blessing just shut up and use it.. I fight demons to find my peace I can’t reason with blind eyed fiends, i’m not sleeping this life is a dream And this life is not always what life could have seemed. I’m living life like today was my last day, I shine bright when I’m lost in a dark place I ride highs and don’t stop when I’m half baked - I rise high to the top and still start gaze.
I've been living with a sorrow struck face, But really that is nothing that tomorrow can’t change. I’ve been running with like ninety nine pace While facing defeat, what another bland taste. I don’t want to hit another back-space No, I hate to retreat and I never have changed I’ve been dreaming, Plotting in my head i’ve been scheming, What will I deform now until I’m leaving? Really I’ve been living life reckless I never have funds Never been so breathless. Life is a mountain of metrics, I’m so confused but I’m soundly relentless. This is the start man, how should I end this? Man I’m gonna write so hard that my pen drifts, And I’m gonna grind so hard that it’s endless, Everybody sees the bright spark I was blessed with. Lately I’ve been stuck on round 2 But I wouldn’t be shit if I didn’t have music, And I’m about to start another round soon ‘Cause the bar won’t raise until I change and I move. I know that this life is consuming, I know I’m a flower that’ blooming, I’m clearing the sky with these clouds that I’m moving And I should be proud when I do it. I don’t want another heart break No I hate just to think what my little heart takes, I don’t really want to live a last day But our lives have a limit so I really can’t waste it. Lately I’ve been living life basic, Rise in the morning and grind for a payslip… This is not the life I was shaping But I’m here now so I rise and I face it. Time is evasive, My mind is a beast until I fight and I brake it. I am the chief of my life And I’m seeping with strife ‘Cause the meaning of life is the steepest of lies. I don’t want a meal just a piece of the pie, I don’t want to chill ‘cause I’m leading the line And I’m scared of the things that I’m leaving behind. But I don’t have time for that, Focus on the moment let your mind relax…
It’s the morning, Not the early but the later kind Everything is slowing down around me I can take my time. In my head it’s kind of rowdy so I make it right Take a right, Left is where I left that other Nathan guy Oblivious, To everything around him with his naked eyes, Billions, of others also blind and also naked eyes? Now I’m on a different path, faced with bigger tasks, Bigger than the last that I accomplished I forgive the past. Don’t relive the past ‘Cause that will only rip the scars Lift your head, And you will see that simple actions lift your heart. Infrared, shows the heat around me when I spit my bars Thinking less, of all the things to come and all the things that passed. Another night, it’s another, it’s another blessing I’m loving life and I’m living like I was never stressing. But I’m neglecting my people Damn, and I keep forgetting.. I keep rejecting my family Damn, and it needs addressing. Am I progressing or regressing? That’s the deeper question. Is this music my profession for deep intentions? I put my mind inside a cage and I don’t need an entrance. It’s not pretentious, I just needed space and freed the tension. Music’s my medicine, I don’t know if it’s relevant But relevance is only the subjectiveness of everything. I know my heart is safe, it’s chilling in the calmest place, Far from all the heathens and the demons in the past I’ve faced. But they’re apart of me, although they made it hard to breath I put it in a verse and then it turns into a masterpiece. Although they made it hard to breath I, put it in a verse and then it turns into a masterpiece.


released November 11, 2020




natestapes London, UK

My dreams and ambitions have led me here, aged 20, I'm now looking to jump start my music career.
Rap is more than a craft or a job to me. It brings my emotions to life and I feel myself live through it. I hope I can convey this in my songs.
I'm always looking for ways to improve, increasing the possible outcomes of my work tenfold.
My feet are, and always will be firmly planted on the ground.
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